Happy

Have you seen this video? I'll admit I didn't pay it any mind until I saw a worldwide compilation featured on msn today. I'm not going to lie; I am now completely obsessed with it. I dare you to not turn it up and bust a move:



I have been thinking a lot about happiness lately, and although I've always known if I count on others to make me happy I never will be, but I found that I was doing that more and more. Guess what? I was miserable. Once I discovered this I have been trying harder to make a conscious effort to make MYSELF happy. You know what? It works. Being happy isn't a life circumstance, but rather a choice you make for yourself. It's not always easy, and sometimes I catch myself slipping out of happiness and into something else, but I'm quicker to recognize it and change it now. Choosing to see (and be) the good in the world has helped, as well as surrounding myself with positive people. I know I'm not always going to succeed at this goal, but I'm determined to be happy more than I am not. I have too many wonderful things to be thankful for to dwell on the silly, insignificant things. When I think of happiness I think of my beautiful nieces, who are always so happy and full of life. What a wonderful example to follow.

Yes, happiness is a choice, and I hope you, my dear friends, are choosing to be happy. If not make the choice to start, crank up Pharrell's song and have a dance party wherever you are. I dare you to finish unhappy. I'm pretty sure it's impossible.

blessed

As I sit waiting for my last pie to bake, enjoying the glorious sounds of my Christmas Pandora station, and wondering how in the world I'm going to get two pies, rolls, and yams to my In-Laws by myself as Mr. Wonderful will be going there straight from work, I decided rather than being overwhelmed by this task to be overwhelmed with gratitude instead. I needed to list the things I am thankful for, because I really am blessed.

• A loving Heavenly Father who blesses me with much more than I deserve. 
• The Guardian Angels He sent to keep my family safe on October 21. You guys. Their accident should have been so much worse than it was, but it wasn't because of Heavenly Father and His angels. God is good, and merciful, and sends angels to keep our loved ones safe. My beloved siblings are proof of that.
• An amazing husband who loves, cares for, and supports me, no matter how crazy the plan or hair-brained the scheme. I know every girl says this about their spouse, but Mr. Wonderful is pretty amazing, and I pretty much have to pinch myself every day because I still can't believe he chose me, the most undeserving of all. 
• My family. I was very blessed to be born into the family I was, and over the last few years my brothers have chosen the best women and as a result I have the best nieces and nephew. We're wild, crazy, and at times dysfunctional, but they are mine and I love them so much. 
• My new In-laws. Even before I married their son and brother they have welcomed me into their family with open arms and have made me a part of their family. 
• Technology. Yes it can be the bane of our existence at times, but it is also a huge blessing. Without it LB2 would have missed our wedding, but because of technology we were able to FaceTime him in from the hospital so he could watch and be a part of the ceremony. 
• Good friends. For fear of forgetting someone I won't name names, but I am so thankful for friends who love, support, lift me up, teach me, forgive when I mess up, and have been my family when I have needed one since mine is so far away. You step in to help with anything I need, big or small, giving of your time, labor, and talents, looking for nothing more than a smile and hug in return. If you're reading this odds are you are on this impossibly long list, and please know just how much I love you.
• Work. It's not all sunshine and roses, but there are a lot of people without work right now, so I know how incredibly blessed I am. 
• A healthy body. After all the health problems I was plagued with last year it made me love and appreciate my healthy body so much more. 
• My talents. Not only have I been blessed with many talents I am also blessed with the ability to share them with others regularly. That is pretty amazing! 
• THIS
• Parents who taught me to stand up for what is right, even if it doesn't make you popular, the value of things, not the cost, and that family is more precious than any thing you can possess. 

This is no where near the complete list, but brevity is the order of the day on this blog. Happy Thanksgivukkah to you all and don't be too gluttonous tonight!!

weird

WARNING: I say 'weird' a lot in this post. Like A LOT. And there may or may not be a monster photo dump at the end as well. Consider yourselves warned.

I’m still working on ‘the post’. It will be at least another 3-4 weeks before we have our photos and video, and honestly once I got my dress on I only remember maybe 30 minutes of the whole night. It's not even a continuous 30 minutes at that-more like random flashes so I’m hoping the pictures and video will help jar my memory. Until then you get this other thing I’ve been mulling over since the wedding.

As of today Mr. Wonderful and I have been married for two whole weeks. The thing I get asked the most is “how’s married life?” My reply? Weird. Married life is a lot of things-but weird tops the list for me. Now don’t get me wrong. I am not unhappy or complaining. I love Mr. Wonderful more than anything and I am so happy he chose me to share this adventure with, but it’s still weird. A good weird, but weird nonetheless.

It’s weird to be Kristen Newman…Mrs. Newman…Sister Newman. It’s weird that the Seinfeld reference I thought was so funny when we first met (‘Hello, Newman’) is now one of the most annoying things ever. It’s weird to know I’m done looking for my Eternal Companion-Mr Wonderful is my guy, forever and ever. It’s weird to have him come home and snuggle up next to me every night rather than call me on his way home from work as I’m falling asleep. It’s weird to be budgeting money and sharing the expenses with him after I’ve been doing it by myself for so long. It’s weird learning how to sleep on a side vs the middle of the bed (the act of ‘star fishing’ makes sharing a bed with ANYONE problematic). Although he had seen me not looking pretty before the wedding it’s weird for him to see me with the sleep in my eyes, morning breath, grumpy ‘just leave me alone and let me wake up in peace’ demeanor, and bangs that stick straight up (no joke) when I very first wake up--every single day. It’s weird living with someone after ten years of being alone and getting used to each other’s quirks. It’s weird that all it took was a 20 minute ceremony for sex to be ok (and encouraged) after 33 years of waiting. It’s weird that I have a whole new family that loves and accepts me and it’s weird how I instantly loved them back. It’s weird to go grocery shopping for two and to make food and know that half to two-thirds of it is not going to go bad before it gets eaten. It’s weird to be buying milk twice a week. It’s weird to not be stressed all the time about dating, getting engaged, or planning a wedding and constantly being on the brink of a melt-down. It’s weird how easily we transitioned from ‘dating’ to ‘married’-especially Mr. Wonderful. He is like a duck in water. It really has been an awesome thing to watch, marriage totally suits him.  It’s weird how jarring it is to go from planning a wedding to being married and how quickly everyone’s lives go back to normal after you’ve been running at Mach speeds for so long (this change happens quite literally overnight). It’s weird that it’s not all about me and my wants and needs anymore; and it’s weird to constantly remind myself ‘I’ is now an ‘us’, and there is another person to consider when I make decisions because they don’t just affect me anymore. There’s an us here now.

So yes, being married is weird. But it’s also pretty fantastic. Although all the things I mentioned are weird, they’re pretty freaking awesome, too. I just wish people would have told me how weird it would be, and that this surreal, weird feeling is completely normal!! I also wish I had taken the people who DID say this to me seriously. Now I will reiterate it for you to ignore like I did:

Marriage is fantastic. But it’s weird. And an adjustment-even when you’ve been together as long as Mr. Wonderful and I. I’m learning no couple is exempt from this, but that’s ok! It’s an adjustment looking at your new signature and realizing that you’re still you (just new and improved), or remembering the hand turning the key in the lock at 11:30 at night is supposed to be there so there’s no need for your pulse to quicken and your adrenaline to race.

So yes, it’s weird. They don’t call it a major life change for nothing. And you know what I’m learning? It’s ok for it to be weird. There’s nothing wrong with me because it’ll be weird for the next little bit. I had 33 years to get where I was before, and no matter how wonderful and right this change is it’s going to take more than two weeks for me to get used to where I’m going next. And you know what? That gets to be ok. Good thing I have a pretty awesome, supportive, amazing, loving man by my side. That helps a lot with the weirdness, too. This marriage thing was a pretty good idea, after all. I highly recommend it. Oh, and as promised here's the photo dump to get you by--thanks to the fantastically talented Nancy for taking them!

With daddy. Look at those lashes!!

LB2 was in a car accident (he's ok!) and was in the hospital so he was unable to attend. I am SO grateful for modern technology and friends with iPads so we could Facetime him in!!

Waving to LB2 on the iPad during the ceremony.

                                                        

You bet there's a zombie on this!

Mr Wonderful wanted cupcakes, so he got cupcakes.

I don't know what this is...

I'm sorry Megan. I LOVE this picture and your "wow this is heavy face" too much!

Dancing with my daddy.

My handsome Groom dancing with my momma

I have silly nieces

My beautiful niece who wanted nothing more than to dance with me all night. She even called last night to ask when I was getting married again. Once is enough for me, baby girl.

Being scary with my nieces.

Yep. She's gorgeous. And my friend. Lucky!!

tie it up

So this happened:

Wow. The flash made me look white but my diamond sure is purty!
Don't worry. He didn't propose at my house. We took this after we got home.

Yep, it’s official. Mr. Wonderful and I are tying the knot!

We (well he) made it official August 31, but we wanted people to find out from us and not on Facebook, Instagram, the blog, or through the grapevine. So chances are if you’re reading this you already know (if you don’t I’m so sorry you were missed-unless you read it on feedly earlier this week that means  you weren't missed, stupid, stupid feedly beating me to the punch), but now that it's official official I’m just too dang excited to NOT say anything every chance I get!!! 

I say 'official official' because the REAL surprise here is we have been planning this since MAY. Yep, you read that right, Mr. Wonderful and I have been secretly planning a wedding ALL SUMMER. *insert maniacal laugh* Why wait so long before saying anything, you ask? Well we wanted a ring on my finger before we said anything, and to be honest after my first failed attempt at making it down the aisle I have been more than a little gun shy this time around. Although I know it's no guarantee of success we both REALLY wanted a ring on my finger before we said anything-mostly so that it felt real to me. I chose to play my cards close to my chest until I was sure it was a done deal. And now it is. Preparations are well on their way.

I would love to tell it here but Mr. Wonderful is a very private guy and has asked me to not share our engagement story with the interwebnets, so I’m respecting his wishes. If the curiosity is just too much to bear I am happy to share it with you personally or via private message if you would like. 

So instead of ‘the story’ here are a few things I’ve learned over the last twelve weeks: 

-I am great at keeping secrets—except my own. I may have let it slip to a few people (ok, like more than a few). Thank you all for keeping your mouths zipped when I could not!!

-Having a few people in the know was actually nice because I had people to talk to and bounce ideas off of when Mr. Wonderful was sick of getting an earful.

-Just because you title your Pinterest board ‘Someday’ doesn’t mean people won’t jump to conclusions and start asking you if you are in fact, engaged.

-You don’t have to have a ring on your finger for people to be GENUINELY happy and EXCITED for you-one person may or may not have started crying upon hearing the news. (You know who you are, and thank you for that reaction. It was priceless to me.)
-When you do finally 'have a ring on it' it's really distracting and you spend a lot of time looking at your hands.

-Although I’ve had marriage on the brain pretty much my entire life (I am a girl you know), forming all these ideas into a cohesive plan that is both economical and practical to carry out is HARD.

-Having a groom who chooses to be completely involved in the planning process is great, but it also makes planning harder because now I actually have to compromise vs "do whatever you want, I will just show up, stand where I'm told, and look good". (Good thing he has ideas that are usually better than mine anyway.)

-TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE. Seriously. In the time it took to look at it and then get Mr Wonderful there to fall in love with it too (24 hours) the venue went from available to not for the day we originally wanted and we had to push the date back a week.

-Although it has been a hard secret to keep, it has been fun having something just between Mr. Wonderful and me (well mostly between us).
-As worried as I was about being labeled a hypocrite or being judged for choosing to be married civilly first rather than in the temple so ALL of our nearest and dearest could be there (most importantly my daddy and our siblings), people have been super supportive and accepting of my reasons. But then I have the best family and friends ever so I shouldn't be surprised by this, right?

-Everything I thought I knew about me has been thrown out the window. Although I HOPE I haven’t been a Bridezilla I HAVE been overly-emotional. Seriously guys, tears at the drop of a hat over the most ridiculous things. Rational Kristen would have been fine, but Bride Kristen? Not so much. It’s quite embarrassing to Rational Kristen, actually.

-I REALLY wish I had followed through with when I was sixteen and decided to start saving for my wedding. Sixteen years is plenty of time to build quite the nest egg--hell, even if I'd started when Mr. Wonderful and I started dating we'd have more than enough for the wedding of our dreams! 

-We have entertained eloping more than once. If we didn’t know at least a dozen people each who would kill us for doing so we probably would have. (Plus once you start paying deposits you're kinda committed to staying put.)

-Having a seamstress for a mother is a huge blessing-I am getting exactly what I want, although having her 300 miles away makes fittings difficult.
-My whole family is just a huge blessing-my little brother is building us the arch we will be married under and then GIVING it to us to put in our yard one day--just because I mentioned it would be nice but out of our budget. Seriously, guys. Anything I have mentioned I would like but labeled 'undo-able' they have taken the initiative and figured out ways to give it to us. Best. Family. EVER. 

-As much as I thought I wanted things to play out one way: Unexpected proposal (well as unexpected as six years can get us) with a ring he chose himself, then letting everyone know and commencing with the planning, this way (as backwards as it may seem to some-including me) was perfect. I loved choosing my ring with him (waiting for him to finally give it to me-not so much) and making plans just the two of us. It’s been fun, but I’m happy to finally be able to let you in on our secret (as are the people who were sworn to secrecy I'm sure)!
-There is no such thing as 'normal' and trying to compare my normal to other people's normal is just a bad idea all around. Things happen the way they are supposed to, and just because it worked a certain way for someone else does not mean that it's how it will work out for you, and you know what? THAT'S OKAY. 

So those are just a few things I have learned over the last few months. I will say October 23 can not come fast enough-I can hardly wait to start my new life with Mr. Wonderful. It’s been a long time coming and patience in the Lord’s timing definitely pays off. He is the perfect man for me and I love him so much.

Because I don’t want to be “that person” I am trying to be sensitive to people I love, so after this post I will be trying to not spam everyone with anything that isn’t solicited, but I am happy to tell you anything you want to know personally!
(Or you can visit the wedding blog I've set up-provided I make time to post there too www.scottandkristen2013.blogspot.com. If that fails you can visit our website if you wanna. www.scottandkristen2013.com/)

have a little faith

Recently I had an epiphany of sorts. All surrounding a five letter word. Faith. For most we associate faith with religion-and whether or not we believe in some form of Deity. But faith comes in all forms, and it’s something I think it’s safe to say we all struggle with in some degree.

I have never struggled with faith in regards to my religion. I know what I believe is true; I know that I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and blesses my life. I have known this from a very early age and have never wavered. Some people say I blindly follow, but to them I simply say “you don’t have to look for something you already know.” In this regard my faith is as easy as breathing. 

Where I struggle with this little word is having faith in others. There have been a lot of circumstances that have shaped me and made me who I am. Some are good, and some not so much. I am no longer bright-eyed and in love with the world; but rather I am cynical, angry, and distrusting towards that same world I once loved. Because of this I am very much a “if you want something done (not necessarily right, just done), you need to do it yourself.” Because of being burned before I always prefer to do things myself; that way I know it’s done and done the way I want it/need it to be. 

Because of my experiences I have a hard time having faith in people and their ability to follow through with what they say they will do, or asking for help because I don’t trust people to do what they say. Although I WANT to believe they will come through, more often than not I find myself expecting the “inevitable” and not being surprised when people do let me down. Yes, I understand what you put out to the Universe is what you get in return, but this is just something I’m really struggling with. I WANT to be that person who trusts people at their word rather than looking at it with skepticism and setting people up to fail before they've even begun.

How does one regain faith in people? Because I’ll admit, I have none.