Tuesday, September 21, 2010

bitter

Why is it that the most ridiculous things are the hardest to let go?



At the beginning of the summer I had an experience that resulted in me having a chip on my shoulder the size of a CRATER and everyone around me being miserable for the next 10 weeks. (I’m sure most of you know what I’m referring to so for the sake of everyone’s sanity I won’t get into it here.)

Last night I ran into the person I “blamed” for my boulder, although it TECHNICALLY isn’t their fault things went down the way they did and had it not happened I would have adored them during those 10 weeks; it was just easier to place the blame and resentment on them. Last night I found myself back in the bad place I let myself slip into all those weeks ago and it was in the middle of yet ANOTHER bitter, dead-horse beating diatribe that I realized I am not very good at letting things go—at least not the stupid stuff.

Why is it so hard to let stupid grudges go? I fully recognize it is ridiculous, childish, moot, and a complete waste of time; yet I find myself rehashing it again and again. I know it makes the people I’m around cringe when I bring it up but I can’t seem to put a cork in it. Am I the only one who has this problem or do I only think I am? And does anyone have any suggestions for me to just LET IT GO and MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE?

Because this is REALLY getting old.

1 comment:

Most Happy Girl said...

Believe you me, you are NOT the only who this happens to. It is really sad, isn't it, that the things we let eat at us are usually the small, petty things. I'm just like you: I'll rehash and rehash until the people around me are completely sick of anything I say, not just about the thing that got me going.

I'm still working on stopping myself, so I don't have any good advice other than this: There are so many things out there that we can control that will make our lives better, why waste so much time on things we can't control that only bring us down?